“The Last House on the Left”: Never use 400 words when two will do

I never believed it was possible to review a movie in two words. Then I saw the 2009 remake of “The Last House on the Left.”

Oh, I once was blind but now I see.

Thus, I introduce to you my first attempt to condense the 90 minutes’ worth of pain, suffering and utter disappointment that “The Last House on the Left” caused into two words.

And those two words are: Don’t bother.

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