Real-life movie moment

The movie: “Unforgiven” (1992); dir. by Clint Eastwood; starring Clint Eastwood, Gene Hackman, Morgan Freeman, Frances Fisher.

The moment: Early morning (3:13 a.m.), my bathroom floor. A showdown between M. Carter @ the Movies and a spider with eyes big enough to reflect the flashlight beam.

The correlation: Evil Glinty-Eyed spider: “I don’t deserve to die like this. I was huntin’ bugs.” Me: “Deserve’s got nothin’ to do with it.” Squish.

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18 Responses

  1. I can never be completely fair to Unforgiven. I don’t like Clint Eastwood generally and then there’s the fact that it murdered Merchant’s Ivory only chance at an Oscar with the faultless Howards End.

    • Unforgiven was the stand out film of ’92 and deserved its Oscars. I can’t help feeling Howards End was nominated because it is the type of film the academy likes on its shortlist. I would say Glengarry Glen Ross, The Player, The Last of the Mohicans and even Batman Returns were as good or better but not Oscar friendly.

    • I haven’t seen “Howards End,” but I have to agree with Fandango — “Unforgiven” was the best movie of 1992, and it stands as Clint Eastwood’s best work as an actor AND as a director. It was a great Western, but there were so many other great things about it — cinematography, the characters, the dialogue, Gene Hackman as the craziest villain ever.

  2. My problem with Clint Eastwood is that no other director has ever tried half as hard to win an Oscar with each film. I think he has a pathological need to win a nomination, which is hilarious given how much he’s still riding the coattails of his own iconoclastic image.

    Having said that, I very much love Unforgiven (I haven’t seen Howards End yet but I have the new Criterion Blu-Ray waiting for me when I head home for the weekend to my PS3 tomorrow). I think it’s an excellent deconstruction of the way people idolized his Western antiheroes (though Josey Wales is still his best Western). It’s also one of his contemporary movies where he clearly cared beyond simply getting that Oscar nod (the others being Bird and Letters From Iwo Jima; because of that they are his finest works of his later career).

  3. Hey, ‘Letters From Iwo Jima’ is a pretty darn good movie.

    • I love Letters. Hell, I think it’s by far his finest film (especially taken in tandem with Flags of Our Fathers, one of his worst). He put all the Oscar grab into Flags, and with Letters he demonstrated that, if he tried as hard to simply make a great movie as he did to win an Oscar with one, he’d be unstoppable. Letters is one of the most moving war films I’ve ever seen, and it actually bothered to flesh out the enemy, something exceedingly rare in even the finest of war films (even the anti-war movies generally just focus on the side of the director’s native country and undermine that position; in a way, Apocalypse Now simplifies the indigenous population as much as The Green Berets).

  4. Also, I wouldn’t have killed the spider. Come on man…

    • Normally I do a catch and release, but a spider with eyes BIG ENOUGH TO REFLECT LIGHT? This is a creature the world must be rid of.

      • My preferred solution is to catch them on a piece of paper and throw them out a relatively high window – in my defense, it’s more that I work on the fourth floor (which is high in Ireland) than that I’m a cruel individual.

  5. And the punch line is?

  6. Well that didn’t work! My comment “And the punch line is?” should have appeared above below “This is a late postscript, but I just watched Howards End this weekend and I think it’s better than Unforgiven. Debate over!”

    • We’ll see about that…

      • No, see, I have a PhD in Debatology from the Yo Momma Polytechnic Institute of Retorts. I particularly enjoyed the elective I took one semester where we built strawmen.

        Ergo, I can always prove my own assertions in any argument. You might say, “I think that Unforgiven represents an artistic peak in which the artist re-evaluated his work as a young man and concluded that his image was a lie. Thus, he sought with this film to amend the perceived flaws of his Western iconography, and whether you feel it was successful you must appreciate his willingness to tear down his own mythos with the wisdom and hindsight of age.” Then I might respond with, “Oh yeah, well I heard you hate children.” It’s science.

      • Ah, the non-sequitur verbal joust. Touche, Jake. Touche.

  7. Hahahahahahahahahaha! I had a similar showdown with a House Centipede last week. I usually crush my own foes, but I called the husband out for this one.

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